Silence and Strength

The more I learn in life, the more I understand how little I know.  That may sound cliché but it is true. It seems that the moment I feel like I have things together and figured out lately, another curve ball gets hurled in my direction.

I have been underestimated recently and treated quite poorly.  While I may not call the individual out directly for being dishonest, that does not mean that I am not aware.  It does not mean that I am a doormat to be walked on and it does not mean that my silence should be taken as acceptance.  My calm nature and my smile does not mean that I am ignorantly going about my day.  It means that I am waiting.  It means that I am acting with great care and caution and that I am considering my options with a tremendous amount of thought.  It means that I am the calm before your storm and that I will take the path you least expect.  It means that I will protect myself with a kind smile and quite nature until I need to act.  When I act, it will be with precision and it will be with everything I have.  I work hard and I care a great deal about what I do both in my career and personal life.  My strength now comes from knowing that I am on the right path and that I can only continue to put my best effort forward.  Controlling other people is simply not possible (or advised for the obvious reasons).   These words may sound vindictive but they are not meant in that way. I do not seek out challenges like this, but I am in a situation where I need to defend myself and I absolutely will. I sleep at night knowing that I am a good person.

This post is vague intentionally but I certainly needed to vent.  These words will give me strength as I face the obstacles ahead of me this week. I will not let my emotions take over.  I will simply smile and do my best in everything I encounter.  This is not worth any more of my heartache or tears, it is simply a crappy situation to be in that will eventually be resolved in one manner or another.  I will heed these words that my awesome mother sent me recently.

Remember not only to say the right thing in the right place, but far more difficult still, to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.” – Benjamin Franklin

Thank you  Mom for being you 🙂

Thank you to my husband this week for being my rock.

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